What do Timothée Chalamet, Harry Styles, adolescent Leo DiCaprio and Brendan Fraser in The Mummy accept in common? They all accept calmly charming, about greasy-looking hair, sure. But added importantly, they are all men with haircuts that accept fabricated anomalous and lesbian women catechism their female continued afterwards they anticipation that catechism was answered.
I apperceive this because I am that woman. And Timothée Chalamet’s beard is that haircut.
Photo by Kristina Bumphrey/Starpix/REX/Shutterstock.
But what is it about TC’s beard (seen at its best TC in the red clothing in November 2017) that lesbians (aka me) adulation so much? And how has this unwashed, blowzy ‘do absolutely fabricated me think, Maybe I’m absolutely bi? (For clarity, I’m not.) It’s the archetypal lesbian brain-teaser – ‘Do I appetite them or do I appetite to be them?’ – fabricated all the added complicated by actuality aloft a man’s head.
To acquisition out the answer, I bit the ammo and got it for myself.
Ever back I came out and abstruse the terminology, I’ve articular as femme. By that I beggarly I’ve accepted the delicacy I already abandoned as an basic allotment of my identity, one that is consistently queered through my lived experience. This agency I’ve never had The Crew so abounding added anomalous women accept where, I’m told, it feels like you’re absolution yourself from the shackles of activated delicacy and heterosexuality. The abutting I’ve appear is at 19, back I replicated the semi-neat bob I had in preschool. I did it myself with kitchen scissors in the bore of my tiny uni room. Cutting my beard short, or off completely, never acquainted adapted for me.
Equally, I’ve primarily been admiring to women who aren’t femme; women with bald beard aesthetics that sit amid what boilerplate appearance angle as ‘androgynous’ and butchness. While the apple at ample may not, I adulation and admire non-normative adulthood in all its presentations and, for me at least, a lot of how that manifests comes bottomward to hair.
After 40 account or so in a hairdressing chair, I feel like I’m advancing from the added administration – I’m aback dabbling with a adulthood I’ve consistently been fatigued to, but never embodied before. I adulation it. I don’t recognise myself. I feel abashed by my own absorption but not in a way I appetite to reject. I absorb the abutting few hours with accompany from assignment who all adulation it (like… a lot. Maybe they adorned me?), nervously tousling and bribery with it, cat-and-mouse for one of them to bead the affable bluff and acquaint me it doesn’t clothing me. None of them does.
The abutting day I try and acquisition my anxiety in this same-same but altered body. I dig abysmal in my apparel to acquisition what my accompany and I dubbed the Alarm Me By Your Name shirt, which feels appropriate. I accumulate attractive at myself in the mirror. One minute I attending like Elaine the Pain from Tracy Beaker, the next, KD Lang. Then it’s Hugh Grant in Notting Hill. For one short, hopeful moment, I anticipate I attending like Chris from Christine & The Queens. I feel according genitalia assured and shy, like I’m masquerading as addition I appetite to be.
I’m still accepting acclimated to it. It was a abnormally cogent bound for me, to visibly go from calmly coquette to article a bit more, well, gay. And I somehow anticipation it would transform into actuality curly, agleam and reckless. My beard is not that able – it’s absolutely not ‘once-in-a-generation’.
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